Second concern has always been a concern. My love life. Simple and small but hard to continue as it is. When he came to visit my family and worked for us, he was always not putting worth much effort.... or he thought that he was doing well but he was just doing what he thinks is expected and never above and beyond. Working with your gf's parents.... it's tough but if you are a man and you love her, shouldn't you work hard to try and prove to them (those who doubt) that he's worth her time and they can trust he can provide for her? I feel like I'm not worth it at times... well a lot of times.... he continues to disappoints day by day. But I didn't want to put so much pressure on him since he's here all by himself living with my family and working with them. But if I bring it up now, isn't it a little too late. It's like training a dog, when they are doing something wrong and it's gone unpunished then you later punish them ... they won't understand it completely ... I geeze I'm comparing him to a pet.......... but that's kind of what I was going for, the idea at least.
I love him as a person, but later on in life, the petty little things... he will hold a grudge when things go wrong and hurt me with the words again.... like before. When it's good, it's so good. We are good together as perhaps lovers... but not in a long term husband and wife kind of way... how to make him understand that I love him but I can't be with him? We won't end up together... my parents who I hold highest of all in this world, they won't accept him anymore since he bluntly told them that he doesn't care about what people think about him.
Ahhh so many complications that makes me want to end it so I won't have to hear about it. Geeze and my run-ons hahaha o well. This is basically how it is in my head at the moment. I hope you can hear my voice when you read this... thanks for reading, i'll be fine ^_^
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